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Why I'd Rather Die Than Be 'Ride Or Die'

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Why I'd Rather Die Than Be 'Ride Or Die' “The ‘Ride or Die girl’ is just a concept created by men to test how far they can manipulate you into staying with them while they violate your boundaries and any shred of dignity you have.”  It’s a tweet I saw yesterday that made me go, shit, yeah, that’s so true.  Throughout any form of media, be it television or film or music or books, the concept of the ‘ride or die girl’ is as present as her equally as problematic cousin the ‘manic pixie dream girl’. In fact, it doesn’t even have to be fiction. Beyonce is a ride or die wife, she stuck by her man despite the fact that he cheated on her. (I mean, really, who cheats on Beyonce?) Rapper T.I’s former wife Tiny was arrested alongside her then-husband for drug charges – who said that romance was dead?  Whilst origins of the term lie in 90s hip-hop and rap, and were historically used as a badge of honour bestowed upon a woman who would stand by her man, the term means something slight...
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The Marketability of the Female Form

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The Marketability of the Female Form Unless you've been living under a rock recently, or have very different tastes than the vast majority of the population in home decor, you've likely seen the hundreds and thousands of different variations of home decorations and furnishings that are based on the female body. Whether it's candles of a busty babe, a poster of a bare behind, or a plant pot of an enviously smooth vagina (no shaving bumps? what's your secret?!) the shops have been flooded with decorations we're supposed to adorn in our homes. I'll be honest, I have very complicated feelings about these. I received one of the classic candles you've bound to see on your Instagram page of a headless woman's naked body. Breasts so perky they could take her eye out (if she had one), bum so round it was literally molded to be perfect, and a stomach so flat it actually reared on inversion. It was a great Christmas gift, and I took plenty of pictures of it both pr...
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Girls, Gays, and Theys: Get To Know Your Bodies!

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Girls, Gays, and Theys: Get To Know Your Bodies! It's an indictment of the British education system that so many young people are brought up not knowing about their own anatomy.  In my school, we didn't even have the 'period talk', let alone any lesson or formal education about sex and the 'female' anatomy. We were left floundering in the wind, turning to TV and other forms of media and popular culture to teach us about our growing bodies. It's no surprise that so many of us still hold misconceptions about our health and sexuality even in our adulthood. Who was there to tell us otherwise? It's this lack of knowledge that has compelled me to write this post, as a way to hopefully educate people about their own bodies and health. After all - it's not just cisgender women who experience this lack of education. This post will be aimed at anyone with Female Assigned Reproductive Systems (FARS) - no matter their gender or sexuality. It's time that we a...
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The Complicated Nature Of Sex Work

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The Complicated Nature Of Sex Work In this day and age, sex work is easier and safer than ever. Whether it's digital work in the form of Only Fans, Cam Girling, and Financial Domination, or something in person like Stripping or Sexual Intercourse, sex work has become much more accessible than it was 10 years ago. Personally, I believe this is a good thing. I'm all for legalising and legitimising sex work, I believe this would allow greater protections for women (sex work, after all, is a dangerous industry) and could ultimately make the industry more profitable. What's more, I also feel like legalising this industry would also help to destigmatise it. Only recently a woman was fired by her employer after her Only Fans account was discovered - despite her engaging in all Only Fans activity outside of work hours and under a different name. By legitimising the sex work industry we would be able to help diminish the stigma surrounding it and ensure that women don't face har...
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The Problem With Consent - And Why Denmark Hasn't Fixed It

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The Problem With Consent - And Why Denmark Hasn't Fixed It The latest news of 2021, the year where it seems anything is possible, comes from across the world. Denmark is trying to take the number one spot for 'most ridiculous thing ever', with a new app they've launched.  The app, called iConsent, is a mobile phone app that allows users to 'consent' to one act of sexual intercourse, which is valid for 24 hours. Sexual partners can digitally log their consent with each other, and even record their previous consent records - something which can be brought up should a criminal investigation ever be launched regarding sexual assault. Unsurprisingly, the app has faced huge amounts of backlash.  It's clearly been made by a man (duh) who has no idea about the complexities of consent, and how this can legitimise so many dangerous people who now feel entitled to their sexual partner's body. In theory, a sexual consent app could potentially (maybe) seem like an al...
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We Need To Talk About The Bridgerton Rape Scene

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We Need To Talk About The Bridgerton Rape Scene Once again, Shonda Rimes has pulled through with another fantastic TV show. Following in the footsteps of Grey's Anatomy, Scandal, and How To Get Away With Murder, Bridgerton was as captivating and as much of a hit as her previous successful shows. In fact, Bridgerton has been named as Netflix's biggest drama as of date, with a whopping 82 million households around the country tuning in to binge the series within only 28 days. And it's no surprise! With a gorgeous cast, a humorous take on regency social etiquette, compelling characters, and stunning costumes and scenery, it makes sense why the series has captured the hearts of so many people. In case you haven't watched the show, Bridgerton's main storyline follows a wealthy woman named Daphne who has come of age and has entered society (aka, she's on the hunt for a man.) At the same time, notorious rake (19th century slang for fuckboy) the Duke of Hastings has ret...
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Unlearning My Own Internalised Misogyny

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Unlearning My Own Internalised Misogyny - A Journey I would be lying if I said that I always considered myself a feminist, and always cared about the advancement of women - no matter who they are. My feminism came to me around the age of 14 or 15, when I stumbled across the concept through tumblr of all places. Yes, my parents had taught me growing up that I could do anything I wanted to as a girl. But the word 'feminist' and it's meaning wasn't introduced to me until my early teens. As a teenager, I'd like to say that I was always particularly 'woke'. Most definitely, the term 'wokeness' has been co-opted to mean entirely different things than what it once used to. Something which I considered when seeing what Chidera Eggerue - more commonly known as the Slumflower - posted on her Instagram story. She speaks about how white people have the privilege of going in and out of wokeness like a trend, whereas People of Colour do not have this privilege. If...
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